From rap mixtapes to edm, Sidharth Ezhilan, better known as Ezzyland, has dabbled in a bit of everything, releasing numerous EPs and building a loyal fanbase along the way. Now, he might have released his best one yet – DEPS X ANXIES.
You’d be lying if you said you weren’t hooked right from the first few bars of the intro, Hello MTV Welcome To My Crib. Relatable? Check. Larger than life? Check. Great fucking music? Check.
buy the album here
1. Tell us a bit about yourself and how long you’ve been in the scene.
i moved back to india this year. it’s been….difficult to fit in. been making music seriously for 4 years i think.
2. You’re one of the few artists who cares more about their internet presence than playing gigs. Why do you think that is?
haha i grew up on the internet man. that’s my home. india is not my home. i’m not welcome here…yet. people here have just started getting cozy with electronic music and the nation’s best artists are edm superstars and viral sensations lmao. besides, i’ll never move out of the internet. i’ll never leave my fans. and it’s not that i don’t care about gigs. as much as it is outside my comfort zone, i have to do gigs to get that good money. i’ve played bangalore and mumbai. they were my first gigs so I did not enjoy them at all. literally everything that could go wrong went wrong and my anxiety was thru the roof the entire time.
but i’m playing delhi this month. if india won’t come to soundcloud, then i’ll bring soundcloud to india, no prob. i’m gonna try and play a shit ton of gigs for the next couple years to really find people who are like me and connect with them, both artists and audience. let’s see how that works out. people here leave their house only to get offended or jump to garbage music. i don’t want anything to do with those kinda people. and i don’t want people pretending to like my music just because it’s cool either, js. i do make music for an international audience but it’s not for everyone, you know what i mean? (also, why i care about my internet audience is cuz i’ve always seen myself with an international audience. i can’t survive in india alone cuz i came too early lmao pun)
3. How’s it being an introvert in the scene? Especially as a producer who doesn’t do many collabs or put out music videos?
i’m fine with talking to people. i just have to play it thru in my mind a bit and push myself a little. once we’re chilling, the wall drops (unless i dislike the normie lolol jk but yea). but yes i’m more comfortable online. if this interview was over the phone, it would’ve been trash lolol. irl, id rather listen than talk. people who meet me are always like “why tf are you so quiet?”.
and wym, most of the indie scene is introverted kids pretending to be outgoing hahaa. it’s cool. i can talk when i need to. but i suppose i need to network more. sitting and waiting to be discovered won’t work. i find that working with other people really slows down my process or throws me off completely. i only really like to work with people who i think are better than me so that i can feel shitty for not being the best and then try and up my game. i’ll do collabs this year onwards. AND i’ll start shooting visuals too I PROMISE!
4. All your songs and albums have weird but catchy titles. Are they all random or do they hold meaning to you?
nothing i put out is random. every title has meaning to it…shit is packed with metaphors. haha wow is this what people think?! “hey he’s putting full weird weird title for gotting the plays and to sound profound.” plebs. but of course i don’t reveal it unless people ask me. i’d rather they make my music the soundtrack to their own experiences. this is the most mature album i’ve put out so far. the titles you see have elaborate backstories involving me dealing with my life up to this point. i really don’t think everyone would be comfortable reading the meaning behind it. like people don’t really wanna know bout your problems yea. they have their own. but i’ll tell you if you ask.
5. DEPS X ANXIES, both the tone of the album and the title itself, sums up the state of mind of the current generation. What do you have to say about our generation, and how do you think music fits into it?
the concept of mental illness is being generalized in the outside world. because kids think it’s cool to be depressed and self-diagnosis is a hot kek rn. really it’s just the resurgence of the emo phase in a new age. i welcome that. people will make great art. but i don’t approve of generalizing or trivializing mental health. kids of our generation are becoming alienated cuz of technology and how society is getting reshaped, and they’re becoming more and more self-aware and learning that it is okay to be an individual. they are learning that they are different.
we are no longer a generation who are raised constantly being told that we are all the same and we are equal, and we have to just conform to life because everyone else is doing it (remember when growing up, our parents would compare us to our friends and be like, why didn’t you score as much as him? cuz we’re not the same, mom). we’re literally trying to make a living out of being our best selves. we’re marketing ourselves. it’s just a matter of being in the right place at the right time. it’s about individuality and finding the uniqueness in you.
and with this realization comes a lot of self-doubt, failure, broken dreams, and all that good shit, and if you’re not careful, you’ll fall into a slump. this might well be the growing cause of unhealthy minds. it’s okay to be sad, kids. it’s okay to cry. but don’t let sad be you. all you need to do is try.
now inside india, we barely even have the concept of mental health. we haven’t copied that from the west yet. so in a way, this album is def an attempt at creating an awareness, but at the same time it’ll be attracting all the bandwagon riders too. me personally, i’m against pills and placebos and shit. last thing you wanna do is be dependent on some shit. so we don’t really want that here. just talk. talk to family or to strangers on the internet. when you find out you’re not the only one who feels some type of way, you feel better. or find an outlet for yourself like i did.
6. What do you have planned next?
like i mentioned earlier, i’mma try and do a shit ton of gigs across the country. more interactive online content maybe. i have to get my brand out. i need to piss off more conformists and make them uncomfortable and eventually desensitize them. i want to connect with people who are like me – people who are comfortable on the internet and open-minded and live in 2017 at least, and live looking forward to the future and people WHO LOVE TO CREATE. basically i need to do some serious damage in this bitch so i can blow up overseas and hopefully one day, i can afford to live my hikikomori lifestyle in shibuya with my cat, dog and bonsai. big plans for a little kid, i know.